It’ll be nice to look back on this moment and know that it is over, that this culmination of emotion moved me toward and forward and I am going to be stronger for it and because of it.
Right now, it was enough to stand up and leave the bridge.
I found myself in tears, sitting on a wrought-iron bridge overlooking the river in Chiang Mai. I went there to clear my mind, cry and talk to Jesus.
I’m not going to get into why I was crying and what I was upset over. It’s a culmination of many things that pent up and then came out.
What I will say, is that I needed to trust that this has a purpose and trust that God is in control.
I wish I knew what God had in mind, why I struggle with the same things, over and over, and what the final result of all this will be.
Life is a story. I don’t know the in between, but I know the beginning and end.
It’s hard not knowing the in between sometimes. Good stories always have conflict and good stories also have conflict resolution. It’s no fun when you are in the conflict stage–waiting for the resolution of hurt sucks.
It’s all for His glory. I don’t know what God’s doing. I know that I trust him. I know that I can’t sit and be hurt on the bridge forever, I have to get back to life. I have to get back to playing my role in God’s story.
Getting up from your place of hurt takes courage. It’s easier to wallow. It takes faith. It takes knowing that there’s a God that sees your tears.